The Big Breakfast Adventure | Smith

(In case you missed how the Big Breakfast Adventure got started, you can read it  here:  How it all began)

I wasn’t quite sure how this was all going to work.  I was heading up to Capitol Hill to meet  Miss Connie, Fritzy & Mr. Fritz to devour The Best Hangover Breakfast in Seattle, rumored to be served at Smith.  Except that I don’t drink, so I am not sure that I can possibly be a very good judge on this breakfasts ability to cure my ills from the previous nights alcoholic stupor.  By a bizarre twist of fate it turns out that the meal bestowed with the Best Hangover Breakfast prize is none other than the Full English Breakfast & THAT I am more than capable of evaluating, having eaten one every Sunday for the first 21 years of my life plus several dozen others dotted throughout my time on earth.

Smith's take on the Full English Breakfast

Miss Connie had a few struggles getting to Smith, since once she had missed the vital left turn & found herself on the wrong side of the I5, there was no getting back to the right side.  Given my track record, it was ironic that Miss Connie called me to guide her, which, I hasten to add, I did {very} well & once we got her back on track she arrived in a jiffy.  Meanwhile, Fritzy, Mr. Fritz & I had secured the table right by the window & were busy ogling the multifarious menu.  Confession time:  I was very nearly side-tracked away from my designated dish.  In my defence it was partly to do with the words “big enough for two” printed alongside the Full English Breakfast, & I wasn’t sure I was up for that much food.  The other problem was that I wanted to eat at least 3 other dishes on the menu.  I can see that Smith will be doing the rounds again once I’ve eaten my way through all 55 Best Breakfasts.

Smith's Oatmeal with Rhubarb

Fritzy opted for the Oatmeal which came with a vibrant splash of rhubarb dolloped into the middle.  I didn’t try it but both Fritzy & Miss Connie declared it to be quite wonderful.  As an aside, Fritzy has lost 40 lbs since I last saw her & she looks utterly amazing.  I did suggest that she might need to find a new a** (since she had run her former a** off)  & that indeed, Smith may well be the place to find it.  But probably not if you’re just going to eat oatmeal, Fritzy.  I am certain that she would have found a new one right there on the Smith cheeseboard.

Smith Scramble

Mr. Fritz opted for the Scramble.  I wish I could remember it’s proper name (which is far more inspiring than ‘scramble’) but unfortunately I didn’t take notes (yes, if you want the truth I was talking way too much) & the menu up on the Smith website is not the same as the one we chose from today.  Anyway…apart from the asparagus being a tad al dente Mr. Fritz declared his scramble to be excellent.  It was one of the things that I was eyeing up on the menu earlier so it was good to at least have it vicariously.

Miss Connie chose another one of the dishes that my mouth was eager to sample & dang it, I can’t remember what that was called either.  Something about peas, green onions & goats cheese in scrambled eggs.  With very exciting potatoes.  No matter its name it too was deemed delicious, so we had a full house bar the verdict on the Full English Breakfast.

Exciting potatoes & yummy eggs with goats cheese, peas & green onions

 It was a {very} fine Full English Breakfast.  The mushrooms were spectacular.  The tomatoes were cooked perfectly.  The eggs were very lovely looking fried eggs.  The beans were altogether too exciting (compared to the Heinz Baked Beans of my homeland) with their deep tangy BBQ flavor & delicious bits of bacon slip-sliding between the enormous beans.  The ‘fry’ bread (people, that should be ‘fried’ bread) was too crunchy (it should be crunchy on the outside but soft in the middle) & almost impossible to cut.  And the sausage.  Oh my.  I thought my mouth was going to spontaneously combust that baby was so (spicy) hot.  Fritzy & Mr. Fritz kindly took care of the sausages for me.  The ham was, well, different (traditionally it should be bacon).

Put it all together though & it was just about as close to an authentic Full English Breakfast as you could get without importing baked beans & sausages directly from Limey Land.  Oh & a couple of slices of Black Pudding & it would have been perfect.

Good job old chap!

Later when we took a stroll down 15th we found a huge HERD of people waiting in line (in the rain) outside Coastal Kitchen.  People, there’s a place half a block down the street serving really great food.  Stop standing in the rain.  Go have brunch at Smith!

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*SANE™, inSANE, SANEity – terms used in Jonathan Bailor’s books, The Smarter Science of Slim (out of print) and The Calorie Myth.

What does SANE mean? Click here.Want more scrumptious recipes? Click here to check out my SANE Cookbooks!

Mr. Fritz - It was the Pork Belly Hash, actually. Connie had the scramble, with the ingredients as you’ve pointed out. The pork belly was also deliciously spicy. Damn fine brunch, and a hell of a bar, too. I’m going back.

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